‘I’m going to talk to God’... these words went through my head as I walked out the door yesterday. Sometimes in order to reflect and gain perspective, we have to go find the light, breath the light, exert our energy in the silence of God’s country.
Everybody who is reading this will experience some sort of major change at one point or another. Sometimes it happens so fast, it’s hard to take it all in. Just like a newborn needs to be soothed, adults have the same needs. We all have different coping skills to the brilliant changes life presents us. This ‘soothing’ place for me is in the mountains of North Carolina. It is only about an hour drive, and it is amazing what a long hike in silence will do for the mind. Don’t get me wrong, the past couple of weeks have been amazing and I am loving every moment of it, but really…life as you know it has flipped upside down and inside out. Come to think of it, I’m not sure what any of us could do to prepare for this life altering experience. Is this one more of Carmen’s philosophical blogs, yes it is.
Having a baby is a huge change for anybody. I was so used to running a FULL schedule, going on my own time, and well basically self-consumed. No wonder God worked his magic with that little embryo! All I can say about that is that, it was time. There is no mistake with God’s timing, he is always right on time. So, between laundry, feeding, rocking, changing diapers, bizarre sleep hours, singing, loving, pacing floors, another episode of the Today’s Show, it was time to get out. Cabin fever is no friend of mine. I did not even realize it was time until my mother called and said, ‘You and your father should really go drive up to the mountains and spend the day outside’. It did not even occur to me, the thought of leaving Tyson home with nanny for 4 hours or more. That was crazy talk! I could hardly go run a few errands without rushing back to the house to make sure baby was OK! This thought kind of blew my mind. Instead of rejecting the idea, I sat there and thought for a minute…maybe she knows something I don’t…maybe through raising 2 kids of her own, she knows the time has come that I get out and take time…to take time. My father and I have always had a unique bond with nature, it is how we bond as father and daughter. Whether it be the mountains or the beach, this is how he shows his love most…in God’s county…away from the world. We both love hiking and having conversations away from the TV, away from a cell phone, away from all these ‘consuming’ worldly things.
Wow, I could not tell you the last time I visited the mountains to simply go take a hike and get fresh air. I could not tell you the last time my father and I took time to bond and reconnect. Life had just become too fast and it was time to put the brakes on. So there we were, he knew all the roads and all the trails. It was time to talk to God. To hike into the unknown and just be. I always have said, if you struggle with faith, go sit on top of a mountain and look around you…how could there not be a higher power…it is magnificent. It reminds me that there is something much greater than myself, that I am only part of the puzzle that all fits together in this thing we call life. I am rediscovering love in a way that I have never done before…I am rediscovering love as a grown woman now. The kind of love that only a child knows…through the eyes of innocent with no boundaries. This is probably the most important gift I can give as a mother, as a friend, as a daughter, as co-worker, a partner, as a human. Rejuvenation is a wonderful. If you do not have the time or resources to take a hike up a mountain, find something that works…just take time. Hope you are having a great week! As always, make it a good one! -Carmen
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