Mommy Diaries Take 5 – Carmen Brown

I know I can tend to get philosophical at times, but this is one of those Buddha moments that I could capture in a bottle. Finally, after a long sleepless night, I took a 3 hour nap when Emory got off work –ahhhhh –the feeling of a new mommy’s head hitting the pillow. It’s magical in its own right. After waking up, I fed my little sunshine and now I am chilling on the back patio to silence. The sun is just starting to set, and it is amazing. All of these vibrant colors are popping through the clouds – yellows –orange – golden hints. I think after having a child, I am actually starting to notice all of those ‘little’ things I took for granted before. At some point we grow up and become these people called adults. Yeah, that’s great financially, sexually, and not to mention your right to a great martini, but we forget about that innocence we once embraced. I think that’s a large part of why I am having so much fun with this mommy thing: it’s every excuse and more to look back at the world through a new set of eyes. Trust me, I have my moments where I question what the hell I’m doing, but when I least expect it, it all makes sense once again. Learning something new and fresh everyday has got to be the coolest thing ever. Part of my ‘pre-mommy’ attitude was also getting into a rut of the same ol’ –same ol’. Yeah, we have our laughs in the morning and I absolutely adore my job (I’m not just saying that because my boss is reading this), but when we come home at the end of the day it can become very routine. I had been saying before I got pregnant that I wanted to get back into a hobby like photography or bike riding – scrapbooking – I even considered going back to school to take a culinary class. Spice is the variety of life, and I get bored very easy! Thank god for my calling as a radio host because you guys always throw me a bone to play with! Just when I thought life was getting too routine for my taste, I saw that little stick that said ‘YES YOUR PREGNANT’!! Now, I’m going to be honest with you, I had a total freak out fest! My mouth dropped wide open, and I’m not even sure I could speak for the first 5 minutes. No – it couldn’t be – how was I going to do this, what about my crazy schedule, what about the fact I have never really even held a newborn, Oh God – Help!!! I was sitting all by myself in the living room and was in complete denial. So what does every good woman do – Call my OBGYN and demand I come in immediately and do a urine test. How could a test from a drug store possibly be right? Who do they think they are (ha-ha)!! So I called the doctor’s office and said ‘I need to see you RIGHT AWAY!!’ They informed me that they were packed and did not really have time at the moment, but to come in later. Oh no – I was not even trying to hear that. I cried and pleaded and eventually they felt sorry for me and said ‘be here in 5 minutes’. That was that. I got in my car and drove like a crazy women not knowing that day was about to change my life forever. At this point, I had not called Emory, because remember – I’m still in denial. They gave me a little cup, it took all of 3 seconds to put that stick in it, and the nurse said with a HUGE smile ‘Congratulations, your pregnant!!’ If you could have seen the look on my face, it was priceless. I knew I wanted to have kids one day, but I had no idea that today was the day!! I remember the nurse sitting me down in room and handing me box of tissue with a confused look her face. It wasn’t like I was 18 years old in an after school special, I was old enough and mature enough to be at a point in my life when women start thinking about having children! I left the doctor’s office confused, happy, not knowing really what to think. All I knew was that Emory was in for the surprise of his life! I waited for him to come from work and we had the ‘talk’. Let’s just say that was the beginning of the rest of our lives. It was amazing to go from 5 weeks pregnant and look at him today and think to myself ‘that lived inside of me!!” Wow! It’s hard to believe that little boy was curled up for 9 months inside my tummy. When I have my 2^nd child (did I already say that) I at least have some idea of what is balled up all cozy inside that big belly! Ok –I am already talking about more kids – Let me sign off on that note. Make it a good one!